How Old Is Grandma?
One evening a grandson was talking to his grandmother about current events. The grandson asked his grandmother what she thought about the shootings at schools, the computer age, and just things in general.
The grandma replied. "Well let me think a minute; I was born before television, penicillin, polio shots, frozen foods, Xerox, contact lenses, Frisbees and the pill. There was no radar, credit cards, laser beams or ball-point pens.
We had not yet invented pantyhose, air-conditioners, dishwashers, or clothes dryers. The clothes were hung out to dry in the fresh air, and man hadn't yet walked on the moon.
Your grandfather and I got married and then lived together.
Until I was 25, I called every man older than I "Sir"- and after I turned 25, I still called policemen and every man with the title "Sir."
My childhood proceeded gay rights, computer dating, dual careers, daycare centers, and group therapy. I thought "fast food" was what people ate during Lent. Having a meaningful relationship meant getting along with your cousins.
"Draft dodgers" were people who closed their front doors when the evening breeze started.
Time-sharing meant time the family spent together in the evenings and weekends - not purchasing condominiums.
We never heard of FM radios, tape decks, CDs, electric typewriters, yogurt, or guys wearing earrings (except pirates). We listened to the Big Bands, Jack Benny, and the President's speeches on our radios. The term "making out" referred how you did on your school exam.
Pizza Hut, McDonalds, and instant coffee were unheard of. We had 5 & 10 cent stores where you could actually buy things for 5 and 10 cents.
Ice-cream cones, phone calls, rides on a streetcar, and a Pepsi were all a nickel. And if didn't want to splurge, you could spend your nickel on enough stamps to mail 1 letter and 2 postcards.
You could buy a new Chevy coupe for $600.00, but who could afford one? Too bad, because gasoline was 11 cents a gallon.
In may day, "Aids" were helpers in the principal's office; "Chip" meant a piece of wood; "Hardware" was found in a hardware store; And "software" wasn't even a word.
And we were the last generation to actually believe that a lady needed a husband to have a baby. No wonder people call us "old and confused" and say there is a generation gap...
Now...How old do you think I am ???
This woman would be...
...Only 58 years old!